Tag Archive | loss

Four Years Gone: Grief, Loss, and the Paradox of Time That Seems Both Immediate and Eternal

mama-october-2010Today (August 14, 2016) marks four years since Mama died. It was a Tuesday then. At 5:50 pm, Mama took her last breath.

She went into what would be her death sleep around 1 pm on Sunday, August 12, 2014, with her last words of “I guess they’re going to throw me out now,” suffering, I think, the final heart attack that led to her death.

I assured her that I was not throwing her out, that she was home, and I loved her. It took me several months and writing Fields of Gold: A Love Story before I realized that Mama was back at nursing school at East Tennessee State University, unable to follow all the instructions she was given because of a congenital hearing loss, about to be dismissed from the program because she could not hear the doctors when her back was turned to them (she compensated for her hearing impairment by masterfully reading lips, even with hearing aids, most of her life). Continue reading

The Second Anniversary of Mama’s Death (8-14-14)

Today is the second anniversary of my mama’s death.

I miss her. But my love, care, and concern for her well-being outweighs my own pain and loss. Because her journey through vascular dementia, Lewy Body dementia, Alzheimer’s Disease, and congestive heart failure is over and she sleeps peacefully, awaiting the promise of total healing in the resurrection.

For that, I’m thankful.